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VETERAN PERSPECTIVE.
UNFILTERED REVIEWS.
Movies, television, military humor, and cinematic opinions from two disabled combat veterans who never learned how to keep the debrief short.
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Latest Reviews
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Written By the Hosts
Field Notes
Aug 25, 2026
Episode Debrief: One Ring, Two Cops, Five Dead Aliens
The Beards suited up for DCU’s Lanterns, a TV-MA mystery series that drops Hal Jordan and John Stewart into small-town Nebraska, where the bodies are alien, the local ranchers are heavily armed, and nobody seems…
Aug 13, 2026
CrossFit Zombies: The Dead Don’t Skip Cardio
Fat Broken Rambo and Thick Nick Fury revisit the zombie movies that shaped the genre—from Romero’s shambling dead to the Olympic-level maniacs of modern horror. Let’s establish one thing immediately: we are not…
Jul 31, 2026
We Watched It So You Don’t Have To: Masters of the Universe (2026)
The Beards mustered for Masters of the Universe — 2026’s run at the He-Man legend — hoping to relive a little 1984. A cast full of big names showed up, and it did not help. Between the tone swings, jokes landing at…
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@beards_of_war →Meet the Hosts
Meet the Beards
Thick Nick Fury
Host
A combat veteran and lifelong comic book fan, Thick Nick Fury brings decades of movie knowledge and a soft spot for Marvel, DC, and classic action films. As the show's resident "when I was young…" storyteller, he's always ready with a great comparison, an unexpected bit of trivia, or a reminder that sometimes the old ways really were better.
Fat Broken Rambo (FBR)
Host
Fat Broken Rambo is a combat veteran with an encyclopedic knowledge of film, filmmakers, and pop culture that stretches from cult classics to modern blockbusters. Quick with a laugh, quicker with an F-bomb, and never short on opinions, he brings contagious enthusiasm to every discussion—but if a movie lets him down, you'll definitely hear about it.
Scorched Earth
Host
Scorched Earth doesn't do lukewarm takes. A combat veteran with a deep appreciation for '80s and '90s cinema, he sets a high bar for every movie and series that comes across the table. Whether he's championing an overlooked international film or explaining why Hollywood missed the mark, you always know exactly where he stands.
Cap'n Jack
Host / Producer
Cap'n Jack is the documentary filmmaker and producer behind Beards of War, keeping the cameras rolling and the livestream on the rails while bringing a storyteller's perspective to every review. Whether it's cinematography, editing, or the little filmmaking details most viewers miss, he's always looking beyond the spectacle to understand what makes a story work.
Watch the Documentary
This Is Not a Draft
Veterans speak on trauma, suicide, and coming home. The feature documentary from Happy Jack Media — streaming free, right here.
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